Monthly Archives: April 2005


eerk, in a hurry.  thought this was funny

How to describe someone who’s…uh…you know…


~ Lights are on, nobody’s home.

~ A few clowns short of a circus.

~ A few fries short of a Happy Meal.

~ A few peas short of a casserole.

~ Doesn’t have all his cornflakes in one box.

~ Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn’t coming.

~ The wheel’s spinning, but the hamster’s dead.

~ One Fruit Loop shy of a full bowl.

~ One taco short of a combination plate.

~ Fell out of the family tree

~ A few feathers short of a whole duck.

~ The cheese slid off his cracker.

~ Body by Fisher; brains by Mattel.

~ Couldn’t pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.

~ An intellect rivaled only by garden tools.

~ As smart as bait.

~ Chimney’s clogged.

~ Elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor.

~ Forgot to pay his brain bill.

~ His sewing machine’s out of thread.

~ If she had another brain, it would be lonely.

~ Slinky’s kinked.

~ Surfing in Nebraska.

~ Too much yardage between the goal posts.

~ Big like ox; smart like tractor.

~ A few sandwiches short of a picnic.

~ Not wound too tight.

~ Shirt size: large. Cap size: small.

~ Room temperature IQ.

~ A few box cars short of a full trainload.

~ Missing a hard-drive.

~ Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

~ Doesn’t have two wits to bat together.

~ Not the brightest crayon in the box.

~ One tire short of a Goodyear.

~ A few Pinata’s short of a fiesta.

~ Butter slipped off the noodles.

~ Not firing on all thrusters.

~ Two cards short of a full deck.

~ Three dots short of an ink-blot test.

~ Forgot to use a surge protector.

~ Half bubble off level.

~ The mental agility of a used soap dish.